Wannita Rmembers....

Wannita here. Guess these ole gloomie winter days has me rmembrin bout my younger days an a wishin fer summer ta come. Good golly, it seams like yesterday, me an BuBBa wuz just young pups in our mid-twenties, waitins on da birth of our youngest puppy Betty-Jo ta be's borned. He.. He.. He.. Why, I rmembers da baby showers dat we had fore she comed along. BuBBa's sister Matilda Lou called one afternoon an wanted to know if'n I wanted a baby shower for my soon ta be papoose. Well now, I told her dat I wasnt much up ta a babys shower, dat my feets an a ankles wuz so swollen an I wuz so ballooned up I felt pretty much like one of them there Sea Cows you've all heard about. So we gived it a litle more thought an I comes up with probly my best idea yet. We'd give BuBBa a babys shower. Heck, I figurd it wuz his kid too. Let him be da centers of everyones attention. I knew I wasnt' up to it. And I figgered I could use a laugh or two. So we planned and fin-eggled an I wuz perty sure BuBBa knews we wuz up ta sumthin. When da nite finelly arrived, I had Jim-Bob, BuBBa's best friend, (still don't know why; Jim-Bob's like a disaster waitin to happen), take my BuBBa fer a ride in da country. They wuz a gonna look fer sum deer. So us girls goes to pertying up da house with ballons and streamers and Matilda Lou had made a cake like a big question mark all in blues and pinks. It was a sight, let me tells yaz. We had pink pelicans everywhere! An invited wuz all of BuBBa's friends an relatives. Well, seems BuBBa figgered sumthin wuz up all-right thanks to good ole Jim-Bob. BuBBa isnt as stupid as I give him credit fer. Seems ole Jim-Bob fergot to take beer with em while lookin fer deer, an when my BuBBa went ta git himself a beer, ole Jim-Bob try'd ta convince him he'd given the stuff up. So here they comes, bout a quarter ta seven. Seeins all da cars in da driveway, BuBBa immedately decides sumthin wuz a wrong with me and runs clear from da barn to da house. Fell over da cat on his way up an skinned his knees. He comes thrashin threw da door a screechin. Thats when we let him have it. SURPRIZE!! everyone yelled at him. I never in my life seen a man more shocked than him. Ole Jim-Bob and Ben from da Co-op wrestled BuBBa down, threw off his drawers, an put one of them De-Pends Diapers on him an sat him on a big stool lid in a chair in da center of da room. An Matilda Lou gave him a bib ta wear an a baby-bottle fulls of beer. He wuz a livin sight now! But, seeins how I wuz alright, BuBBa finelly calmed down enuf and starts playin along with us. Hell, wasn't much he could do. We'z already had it on film. He even stuck a little bonnet on his head. He opened presents an squirted beer round at Jim-Bob an Ben, an Billy-Bob. An Matilda Lou's cake wuz ta die fer. Then ta top it off, cute litle Annie Lynn from da bank stopped by just in time to see BuBBa diggin down da inside of his De-Pends Diaper fer sum cake that had fallen. I thought he wuz a gonna pee that diaper when he seen her a starein at him! He wuz as red faced as a coon with a sunburn! We all had a good laugh outta that there shower. An lottsa good memorys. Well, dont know if BuBBa's memorys of it are as good as ours or not, but we shore had a good time! Ah... to be young agin. Enjoy it girls, an always rmember, the best laughs ya can have, are always at sumone elses expense! (Usually yer husbends!)

Till next time... Wannita